Christmas Past

The holiday season brings me warm memories. Christmas was my mother’s favorite holiday. We always decorated a tree. Family members often gathered at our home for food, drinks and fun. One Christmas, my mother and I purchased a Christmas tree. My father simultaneously went out and chopped down a pitiful “Charlie Brown” tree. My mother opted to use the tree my father chopped rather than the lush, pre-lit, perfectly shaped tree we had purchased. I didn’t understand then, but now looking back I realize that she chose to protect my father’s feelings rather than to decorate the perfect tree. My father soon discovered our perfect Christmas tree and insisted we use it instead of the one he chopped. After much back and forth, my mother relented and used the tree she purchased. This demonstrates the true meaning of this wonderful holiday season. I look forward to spending many more holidays with my family and hope that I can pass these strong messages of selflessness I witnessed. Happy Holidays.

Autumn

Autumn is my favorite time of year. The crisp morning air, harvesting fruits and vegetables, fall fairs, hay rides, apple cider, and caramel apples are all a part of this awesome season. There is something about fall that causes me to focus on transformation. This has been an extraordinary year of transformation for me. Last year, I was forced to face some harsh realities about life in general. Facing those harsh realities forced me to re-evaluate my focus in life. Most of that new focus was directed towards career growth. Life wouldn’t be life if we were not always learning. As I achieved more control over my career, I realized the extent that my personal life was out of control. Out of control is relative, some might see my life as pretty normal, but when negative patterns of behavior that have developed over decades come into clear focus, it’s earth shattering. It’s the “aha” moment that Oprah always speaks about on her show. The point of all this babbling is, “As far as I have come, I have miles to go.” Ask yourself, how have you transformed in 2009? How will you use what you have learned to grow in 2010?

Public School Holidays

I was watching one of the news channels last night and the topic was public school holidays. There was a debate regarding the right of other religious groups to have their holidays incorporated into the school calendar. It struck me because I hadn’t thought about school holidays in terms of religion. When I was in school, it was simply a day I didn’t have to go, as an adult without a child it didn’t concern me. Now that I have a child, I find myself interested in what role diversity will play in shaping my child’s school year.

We are a nation that is built on the principle of separation of church and state. There has been much debate about prayer in school, now it turns to school holidays. Personally, I think that if schools are going to be diverse and inclusive they must take into account religions other than Christianity when developing the school holiday schedule. Diversity does seem to be an overused word, but it has its place and must be considered. As we continue to evolve as a country we are going to have be more flexible and inclusive. The challenge is to determine how much flexibility is too much and will we know when we have reached our boundaries? What are your thoughts?

Reality check

Are Americans in for a huge reality check? I think so. The economy has changed the rules of the game. Just four years ago, we were charging and using credit cards like our minds were bad, now just a short time later, that credit debt is strangeling us. There is no hope for more credit, our homes have lost their value, it’s back to basics. Food, shelter and water. Those are the things we are focused on. Gone are the days of extravagent parties, big SUV’s, huge homes, and fabulous dinners. Here are the days of packing lunches, small get-togethers, fuel efficient cars, downsizing, and spending time at home with family. I can’t say that I am disappointed. We were valuing the wrong things and neglecting the things that were important. There is a great article on Yahoo. “Worst Is Yet to Come:” Americans’ Standard of Living Permanently Changed

Phobias

What is your phobia? I claim acrophobia. Acrophobia is defined by wikipedia as an extreme or irrational fear of heights. I have been plagued by this fear my entire life. As a child, it kept me off the Ferris wheel, except that one time, I took a chance and cried like a baby in front of all my cousins. I can only ski on the bunny slopes because of my fear. The thought of being stuck mid-air on a gondola takes me right back to the Ferris wheel ride. What frightens me the most is the strange urge that takes over my body. When I am on a high balcony, crossing a bridge, or in any situation that involves height, I experience this overwhelming urge to jump. Suicide has never been my flavor, but for that brief moment, I am paralyzed by fear and the only way out is to jump. Strangely enough, I am not afraid on airplanes, but a helicopter ride scares the hell out me. I have made a conscious decision to conquer this phobia. I will let you know how it goes. What is your phobia? Let’s conquer them together.

Domestic abuse

I have read the updates on the Chris Brown and Rihanna fiasco. The events are disturbing on many different levels. I think about the age of these stars and the impacts to their career and life. Hopefully, the attention highlights irresponsible behavior and facilitates a real discussion about domestic abuse. I am reserving judgment; I have no idea what occurred that night and will not place blame. There are thousands of domestic abuse cases not covered by the media. And even more that are only known to the participants involved. There are probably hundreds of thousands of people living in their own personal hell as a result of domestic abuse whether physical or mental. The silver lining in the Chris and RiRi cloud might be that someone somewhere is paying attention and makes positive changes. If you are ever involved in a domestic abuse situation or ever witness it occurring, do the right thing and take action. Only through action can we change this deplorable behavior and start to make strides in respecting others.

Career choices

This economy has forced many people to rethink their careers. There are numerous articles dealing with the topic. Encouraging people to choose a career they are passionate about is all the rage. It isn’t rocket science, if you do something you love, you will excel at it. I read an article by a very accomplished CEO that said he aspired to a career in oceanography. During school, he struggled with chemistry so his father suggested that maybe he was going down the wrong path. If he were good at it, it would be easier. He took some tests to discover his strengths and ended up studying economics. He graduated at the top of his class with little effort. The point is, if we choose something that we love to do and it comes naturally to us, we will be happier and more fulfilled. Life and work will be fun rather than laborious. If you are having fun, then how hard are you working? Get it.

I have taken personality tests and career aptitude tests to determine my interests. According to the tests, my favorite activities are collaborating, networking, teambuilding, creating, designing, and writing to name a few. My Myers-Briggs Type is ENFP. My challenge is to find a career that allows me to exercise these activities and values my personality traits. Your challenge is to determine your career interests and find your perfect job. If you have, please tell us about your journey so that we may benefit from your success.

Rediscover the library

Remember the library? I recently went to my local library to get a card and check out books. Once I stepped into the library, I realized the last time I was in a library was at the University of Virginia in the early 1990’s. This economy forced me to revisit what I have always known was there, but was too flippant with money to utilize. It was actually an enjoyable experience. I checked out several books for my four year old and books to help me get organized and update my resume (something else the economy is forcing me to revisit). I was shocked to learn that a person could check out 75 books at once. Why would you need to check out that many books? How would you remember to return them all? All in all I am so glad I went, next time I plan to take my little boy. I was also reading somewhere that you should spend one day a month in the library prioritizing your to do’s, planning menus, writing notes to friends, writing in a journal and doing all those things you always promise yourself you are going to get to. I think it’s a great idea. Visit your local library and see if it makes you nostalgic.

Life coach

I am on a path to growth both personally and professionally. It’s hard to balance the challenges of my everyday responsibilities with the time I need to invest in exploring this path. My family is my main focus and my first priority. I scowl at the suggestion that I should put myself first. The inability to put myself first may be seen as a character flaw, but it’s part of my personal makeup and I like that about myself.

I surfed the Internet for ideas and guidance on finding balance. Everything pointed me in the direction of life coaches. They provide tools to create a plan for the future that may include, changing careers, repairing relationships, striking balance or getting your act together. There are tons of advertisements online for life coaches.

Life coaches are a growing phenomenon as so many of us are pulled in many different directions and have competing priorities. At first, I thought it was silly to have someone help me plan my life. As I warm up to the concept, I like it. The value I think a life coach brings lies mainly in helping people think outside the box by figuring out creative ways to accomplish all their hearts desire.

Goals for the year

I do not believe in New Year’s Resolutions. They set us up to fail. The beginning of a new year is a great time to reflect on the past year.  It also provides an opportunity to set specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely (SMART) goals for the new year. Applying these principles to your goals will increase your chance of success.  

 

If your New Year’s Resolution is to exercise, your chance of failure just increased.  You haven’t defined exercise.   You haven’t decided how often you will exercise.   What are you measuring yourself against?  What are the chances you will accomplish this vague goal?  Build your goals over time.  Take baby steps.  A SMART goal is to commit to taking the stairs at work at least once a month for the year.  After a month, you might even modify the goal to increase the frequency.

 

My goals for 2009 are:

(1) Take at least one personal or professional development course a month.

(2) Volunteer at least once a quarter.

(3) Network at least once a quarter.

(4) Read at least one new book a month.

 

I will keep you posted on my progress.  This list may be modified during the year.  I read an excellent blog today that puts a different spin on New Year’s Resolutions.  What excess in your life will you prune in 2009?